Does my partner know I am having an affair?
Many people who start sleeping with men or women behind their partners back soon start to feel a small amount of guilt slip in and the question starts to arise “does my partner know that I am having an affair”. The question is, what can you do to work this out?
Now I have to say in 90% of cases if you partner thinks you may be having an affair, they will probably come out with it within a week or two. In fact, if you partner’s suspects you are having an affair and isn’t saying anything, this might be slightly more concerning as you will probably find they are also having one.
So the real question there would be; is YOUR partner having an affair.
However, this blog is all about sussing out if your partner might be onto you and how you might be able to throw them off the case.
Here are some telltale signs
1. They suddenly start taking more interest in where you are. Perhaps you get more messages off them during the day or if you pop out. Maybe they are asking more questions about what you have done with your day as well as secondary questions you might not normally get eg “How was the gym? What exercises did you do?” That additional question is just to see if you stumble over the details.
2. They might start wanting to come with you at random points eg “Ill come with you to Sainburies, there were a few things I was going to pick up too” Again, this is to just test you to see how you react to them suddenly wanting to come with you and to see if it makes you flustered. I mean imagine if you did tell your partner you were going to Sainburies but you were actually going to have sex with your lover, then your partners say, “Ill come” you would be completely busted.
3. Another classic is your partner starts ringing the place you said you were rather than your mobile. “Hi Sarah is Jane there, I can't get through to her mobile” Many people use excuses like going over my friend's house tonight. You might find your partner starts ringing that friend directly and asking to speak to you. Unfortunately, the only back up here is to get your friend ready with the response, “she has just popped out to the shops, back in ten”, then get them to call you as soon as possible”.
4. Finally, your partner might simply follow you.
The problem with this is by this point there are going to be so onto you, you are probably going to get caught. Really if you find that point one and two starting to happen, really you need to either put the affair on hold until the questioning starts to die away or you need to cut it off as you are probably going to get caught. Really a secret affair only works as long as your partner has absolutely no idea at all. The minute they smell a rat and you begin to think “does my partner know I am having an affair”, the game is probably up!